Coronavirus entry 12: Surviving the M.E lockdown

During a recent catch up with a friend of mine over text, she was asking how I was coping with being in lockdown. I told her I wasn't particularly enjoying it, but was just trying to get through it like everyone else. What I hadn't anticipated was her response: 

"...to be honest, life with M.E is like lockdown, sadly. I don't want to upset you darl, but I haven't been out the house since my op in February and am now bed bound again so it doesn't feel any different for me."

Wow, did that make me sit up and take note. Now I know there was no malice in her reply, but it suddenly hit me. My poor friend, who was diagnosed with M.E whilst at University, has spent the best part of 20 years suffering with, and trying to live with, this condition. She has spent so much of that time in her own lockdown situation, so what we as a country are going through now, doesn't feel strange for her in the slightest. In that moment, I honestly felt horrendous and selfish for telling her I was struggling.

For anyone who doesn't know, M.E (myalgic encephalomyelitis) is a disease of the nervous system which causes chronic fatigue, muscle and joint pain, head fog, difficulty with concentrating and sore throat/glands, to name a few. Not everyone with M.E suffers with it in the same way, but when it hits you hard, you are often bed bound for weeks, if not months. 

I am very aware of the struggles she goes through. On the good days, we can have some really lovely catch ups but there are times when I don't hear from her for weeks, and that's when I know she's really bad. Thank goodness for text messages because even a quick message to say hi to her, I know helps so much. During the bad days, she does sometime find the strength to reply, even if it's a thumbs up or love heart emoji. Occasionally I'll get a text from her mum and my replies then are usually longer as I know she can spend time re-reading them to her when she's up to it.

Life really does have a funny way of reminding you of what you should be grateful for. I know one day, my friend is going to be able to muster up enough energy to come round to my house so we can sit in the garden and drink cocktails together. I also know one day we will be able to go to the pub and have lunch together and gossip like we used to, and I can't bloody wait. 

Back in the day....

To anyone who might be feeling a little bit sad tonight, please don't. Pick up the phone, call a friend and have a good cry or moan, and remember this life we are living is crazy right now, but be grateful for all you have. We will get through this.

To my friend, Amy. You are an incredible human being. I know M.E wasn't part of the plan, but you, my friend, continue to always be the sweetest, most kind hearted and loyal person and I am so grateful that I have you in my life. I PROMISE, the moment you say you are feeling ok, I will be round to see you. Thank you for throwing some perspective my way, and I will continue to always be here for you, regularly update you with my news and carry on writing my blogs for you! 

For more information about M.E visit the ME Association website.